FAQs
Is “Merlin Mann” your real name?
Definitely. I’m named after my late father and grandfather.
Is 43 Folders your job?
It’s one very enjoyable part of my job. Here’s a rundown of the basic gerunds in my work life:
- writing & blogging - In addition to writing for and maintaining 43 Folders (and a few other sites of my own), I occasionally write features, columns, reviews, and assorted short pieces for magazines like Make, Macworld, and WIRED.
- podcasting, broadcasting & new media - I appear on several popular podcasts and radio shows including You Look Nice Today, MacBreak Weekly and CBC’s Spark, as well as occasionally doing various kinds of independent reporting, broadcasting, and production. (n.b.: I don’t necessarily consider myself a journalist)
- speaking & presentations - Often, I’m invited to speak to companies, conferences, and organizations about personal productivity and “life hacks,” among other topics.
- coaching & consulting - Although I’m not actively seeking new client work, I occasionally work with companies and individuals who are looking for help with improving their productivity and work set-up.
- advising & board-sitting - Finally, I advise for and consult with a (small and increasingly select) circle of friends and colleagues to help them improve their websites, products, and internal processes.
I do lots of different jobs I guess, but 43 Folders is near the center of them all. So, sure. Yeah, it’s my job.
So, how do I tell people what you do?
I suppose you can just say that I’m an “independent writer, speaker, and broadcaster.” That’s what I tell people, anyhow.
But if you’re looking for something more canonical (since it does seem to come up a lot), here you go:
- one-line - “Merlin Mann is the creator of 43folders.com.”
- three-line - “Merlin Mann is an independent writer, speaker, and broadcaster. He’s best known as the creator and primary contributor for 43folders.com, a family of websites about personal productivity, ‘life hacks,’ and simple ways to make your life a little better. He does what he does on a Mac in the western third of San Francisco.”
- longer - Here you go
May I call you a “consultant?”
I wish you would not.
But aren’t you a “productivity guru?”
No. I’m just a disorganized man with a website. I am the guru of nothing.
Are you going to [Burning Man | SxSW | some party in SOMA | some conference | other]?
Never. Probably not. We’ll see. Maybe. I doubt it.
May I send you invitations for “LinkedIn,” “Plaxo,” “JerkStore,” or some other annoying business networking site?
Only if you want it sent back like an overcooked steak.
Seriously, please don’t send me this stuff; I’m not a baseball card.
Do you have a MySpace page?
Only if it’s waiting for me on some kind of ironic eyeball-searing machine in hell.
Could you forward my email to [Leo | Amber | Roderick | some other person I’m basically stalking]? Or, better still, could you just send me their personal email address?
No. That’s not going to happen. And, for the record, it’s a creepy thing to ask. Seek counseling.
Why don’t you respond to my awesome email messages I send you?
It’s nothing personal. But, in addition to getting way more email than I can ever respond to, I’ve decided to use the time I used to spend on email to make things that are awesome. I think that’s more important than email.
If you contact me about work-related stuff like my speaking engagements, my assistant will be happy to get you whatever you need to hire me. She’s smarter and nicer than me anyhow, so believe me, you’re better off.
Thanks for understanding.
Why do you hate PR people so much?
I don’t hate anyone. And I have a lot of friends in some form of public relations. They seem nice. Also, people I work with and who represent me use PR to promote my stuff (usually without my input, unfortunately). But.
What I despise is an industry where smart people who should know better are compensated to abuse the openness of the internet for selfish reasons. These are frequently professional interruptors, shoveling white-collar spam.
If the folks who have chosen that line of work can’t understand the poison in bothering people programmatically, then they have bigger problems than can be addressed in a pithy internet FAQ.
Will you be dropping the “f-bomb” that much when you speak with my group?
Absolutely not. Unless you specifically request it. In which case it is complimentary, of course.
Will you be wearing pants when you speak with my group?
Yes. Owing to requests from numerous clients, pants in some form or fashion are now standard equipment for all of my public talks. N.B.: In the event that my work with your company will not demand an onsite visit, please inquire about substantial discounts to the extant “trouser tax.”
What’s up with that weird username you use sometimes? Does “hotdogsladies” mean something dirty?
No, it does not. The name is based on a line in my favorite novel, the Pulitzer Prize-winning, A Confederacy of Dunces, written by the late John Kennedy Toole. It comes from the scene in which Ignatius is attempting to vend hot dogs at a fancy ladies’ party.
I highly recommend that you read the book for yourself; it’s extremely funny.
Do I look nice today?
Yes. Yes, you do.
Do you sometimes talk into your wallet like it’s a mobile phone?
Yes. Yes, I do.
Is 5ives supposed to be funny?
Sometimes. Ideally. Yes.
Didn’t you used to play in a band in Tallahassee?
You bet I did. Although I’m best known for playing in “Bacon Ray” (1994-1999), I was also in “Parachute Pants” (1997-1999) and “Three-piece Spicy Whitemeat” (1993), as well as playing solo shows under my own name since I started college in the mid-80s.
I also played in an unnamed heavy metal band for exactly one afternoon in 1985. We were execrable.
When you lived in Tallahassee, didn’t you also used to dress up as a gorilla and call out Bingo numbers?
Yes. For several years in the late 90s, it was my honor to be one of the people who portrayed “Jungo,” the Bingo number-calling gorilla.
Most Sunday evenings, Jungo — presented as an escapee from a regional conservation park who aspired to become a Las Vegas insult comic — would appear at a club called Waterworks, alongside the bar’s owner Don Quarrello. Bar patrons were treated to several rounds of bingo, playing for modest prizes such as free food and drinks.
At the end of the evening, Jungo would customarily take suggestions from the audience to create an improvised rap song full of abuse and gorilla-based braggadocio.
Didn’t you go to New College in Sarasota, Florida?
Yep. Started in 1986 and graduated in 1990. Had a great time, too. Afterward, I had the honor to serve for a couple years on the boards of both the New College Foundation and the NC Alumnae/i Association.
How did a homunculus like you end up with such an adorable family?
I have absolutely no idea.
Didn’t answer your question? Drop Merlin a nice email.
